Having Goals Will Make You Blind!
In 2008, what will your path look like?
Ed. Note: Hi Stumblers! Thanks for stopping by. If you like what you see and want more, subscribe to my RSS feed, or sign up to receive updates through email in the right-hand sidebar.Â
This is the time of year when we all sit around and think about ways that we can torture ourselves over the next twelve months in the hope that our suffering, guilt, pain and knee injuries can somehow leave us better in December than we are today. The impetus for this cycle usually begins with a New Year’s Resolution, but it could also be called a Goal. In this post, I’ll argue that traditional goals aren’t the only path to a happy and rewarding life.
S.M.A.R.T. is No Way to Go Through Life, Son
All the traditional advice about self improvement and goal setting teaches that we should set goals that are Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant and Time-bound (S.M.A.R.T.) to be optimally successful. In this line a thinking, it’s bad to have a resolution to be more physically fit this year. A great resolution would be, “I want to complete a 5K running race in under 25 minutes by June this year.”
This is all well and good for things that are simple in concept and easy to quantify, but I think this way of formulating goals really misses out on a key point: Humans aren’t good at figuring out what specific actions will make them happy.
I’m sure if you think about it hard enough, you can come up with the name of a person that you know who set very specific goals, worked toward them relentlessly, achieved those goals, and is completely and utterly miserable because of it. In my experience, there’s one in every family (Hi, cuz) 
It seems to me that we are pretty good at figuring out what Feels Good, but not at identifying the actions that will get us to those feelings. When we become hell-bent on their being One Best Way to achieve our goals, we become blind to other paths and choices that may be more efficient, pleasurable or accessible.
That’s why we need to be more nimble in our planning.
The Compass Approach
Being nimble is the whole idea behind the Compass, Not a Map approach to life planning. By choosing a direction to travel in, but not a specific path to take, you leave many options open and have the ability to adapt as circumstances shift around you.
For example, you may decide that you want to become an expert in Information Technology. At this point in time, one programming language may be preeminent in your chosen field, but we all know that code comes and goes. As you work in the direction of your dream, you can choose the specific tools and routes that are best suited to the moment without locking yourself into one confined area.
By using the Compass Approach, you keep your eyes open to the world and are better able to accept opportunities as they come. You are also able to recognize when a slight shift in direction might actually be the crooked path that is faster than the straight line.
An Example From My Life
Just two days ago, I was writing about my image for the future year and a specific step that I want to take this month to get closer to that image. What I didn’t write about was several more steps that I charted out on a long car ride. Without even realizing it, I had locked myself into a pretty rigid schedule for the next month. All of the activities that I pre-selected were good and helpful, but they didn’t leave me any room to be nimble.
Well, another opportunity has presented itself and I’ve had to readjust my plans. This is a move that has the potential to move me along in the direction of adding more value to my blog, but it does so in a different way than I had envisioned. I don’t think it will affect my Sunday afternoon planning sessions, but it will probably interfere with some of the other activities I sketched out, so they will have to go if necessary.
Isn’t it great how life teaches us exactly what we need to learn?
Have you ever had the opportunity to learn to be nimble because life brought you new opportunities? Take a moment to share your story in the comments.
Photos courtesy of Bluedaisy and Weirdvis. As always, credit for Compass, Not a Map goes to Stephen Shapiro and his awesome book, Goal-Free Living.
Related posts:
Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.
Your image of the compass and being nimble speaks to me. My blog is doing well after two months of really working it and I’m feeling other parts of my life being out of balance. If my goal is to get the blog to some state by some date then I miss out on the enjoyment of the organic growth of the blog.
So, I’m reevaluating my goals in terms of more balance and more relationship in my life and more enjoyment of the time I do spend on my blog.
I like your compass idea. I also find myself changing plans and direction in response to opportunities that are presented to me. It’s not a good thing to feel locked in.
There is a coaching technique that is useful with some clients called the wheel of life. The person who need their options open until the last minute and wants to be as flexible as possible likes that approach. Your compass allows this.
Some people need more structure. They need a plan and rules etc.. they aren’t wrong and aren’t missing out, it is just a different way. There is no one correct way and what works at one stage may not work at another. I think it is important to be flexible and when something isn’t working, change it.
I appreciate you reminding me of this concept. It is a good one and will serve many people well at various times. Most importantly, we need to value people over processes and relationships over results.
@Bruce – thank you for pointing this out. Yes, some people need a more structured approach to carrying out plans. I will have to Google the Wheel of Life. Can you recommend any resources for this?
@Karen – yes, being locked in is exactly the problem. Too often people stay stuck in a method when the outcome isn’t even what they want any more.
@Sol – I know you’ve been working like crazy on your blog, so I can imagine other things are falling by the wayside. As Yaro is always reminding us, it’s not a race. There’s no point in gaining a great blog but losing your personal life! Good luck with your quest for more balance.
Maria, great message, instead of SMART goal, I’d like to introduce SMARTER goal, the two additional is Expectation Management and Revelation.
Great to have goal, but along the journey we must be willing to adjust our expectation, and we need to keep looking forward to the revelation that God has given us, opportunity that has opened for us.
Thanks for sharing!
Robert
The compass is an excellent analogy to keep your eye on the goal while you detour around life. As the Beatles song says, life is what happens while you’re making other plans.
Balance and flexibility are certainly the keys to reaching goals. I can’t think of any examples beyond a few days in real life where anything is linear. Even saving for a specific purchase isn’t linear, unless you’re fantastic at taking the same few dollars each week and putting in your cookie jar until you can buy that bicycle. And thank goodness it isn’t linear or we’d all be saving for our grandchildren’s retirement instead of our own. (Compound interest is exponential).
This article also makes me feel better about being one of the few people I know who never makes New Years Resolutions. I know I won’t keep them anyway, so why waste the time and beat myself up?
Hey, I love the SMART stuffs.
[...] thanks to David Bohl of Slow Down Fast for including Having Goals Will Make You Blind! in this week’s Carnival of Personal Development and Happiness. David did a great job filling [...]
Great insight. It pays to be nimble, but it is hard not feeling like you’re slacking on your goals.
This is one of the best posts on goal setting that I have seen in a while. Sometimes it is hard to remember to make time and be flexible.
Fortunately, although I do work a lot, I also sometimes just stop to smell the coffee–or leave the compass behind and do my navigating outdoors using the sun’s position to get my bearings.
Look forward to “stumbling” across your blog again…and see you in BMM.
[...] Never the Same River Twice – Having Goals Will Make You Blind! [...]
[...] Having Goals Will Make You Blind! earned a place in the Doing it Differently Blog Carnival at Today is That Day. Aaron Potts started this carnival to features post about “stepping outside of the box and living our lives in ways beyond the ‘norm’!” You’ll find plenty of out of the box thinking in these posts: [...]
A lot of personal development blogs make the mistake of thinking that life = career. A career is just a job that pays for your life. A better career enables more options, but certainly is not the key to happiness.
Nice blog though, and I do agree with keeping paths open, and focusing on the destination.
[...] the same river twice: a blog that talks about change. An interesting message from her, saying that having goals will make you blind. This is quite a thought-provoking article on how you should make your [...]
[...] to how you use goal setting. I happened upon a couple of posts by a frequent commenter on this site Maria Gajewski that describe her “compass approach” to goal setting. The analogy of a compass, rather [...]
[...] call this process Traveling by Your Inner Compass. It’s a lot different than the typical SMART goals that most coaches and counselors advise you to make. In brief, Traveling by Your Inner Compass [...]